Monday, 15 October 2012

This is the way I felt on my way to the scale the other day...

written by Linda Gauthier

The fear on this little guy's face is exactly how I felt, but the determination to succeed is also equal!


I didn't realize before I started this adventure how much it meant to me to lose this weight.  I knew I wanted to be slimmer, but I didn't realize how much I truly wanted it.  I have lived with it and convinced myself to accept it as being who I am, and adjusted my expectations for myself accordingly, for too long.  Allowing the little internal voice to convince me that: I can't lose this weight, you are too old, this is the way it is, avoiding pictures, avoiding doing things, avoiding doing anything for fear of failing again.  Accepting that it was better not to try, rather than try and fail.  The reality of how much I wanted this came crashing in on me this week when I was afraid to get on the scale, for fear my little voice was right!  I was truly afraid to get on the scale, I have been doing so well and I didn't want to lose my hope and dream of being thinner, healthier, and more active.  It isn't an obsession for me, I'm not going to say I'm developing some eating disorder.  Rather, I believe I am beginning to recognize that I have been dealing with an eating disorder for my entire life.  One of overeating to fill those voids in my life, the real or imagined. 

So, this is my mantra I will be chanting to myself, until it takes root and my little voice can no longer be heard whispering all those negative thoughts.     


So here we go, the moment of truth..............

I swear I heard the angels sing, and a holy light shine down on my bathroom scale as I slowly opened my eyes to take a look.
"I LOST, I LOST", erupted from my throat.  Got off, got on again. Yup, I lost, holy sh--- I lost, thank you, thank you!! I sang as I danced around the bathroom, wiggling my 1 lb lighter butt. 
I lost 1 lb, only 1, but to me it felt like 10, ecstatic!!!  
Giving me a total loss of, drum roll please---17.2 lbs since September 1st or 2.44 lbs per day, over the last 42 days.
Half-way to my goal. Wiggle Wiggle. If I had a tail, it would be waggin.

Now, to set the menu for next week, hopefully more pounds lost, and a stronger ego that will be more accepting of temporary disappointment, because this is a battle I'm going to win.


Not sure what it says underneath the picture, but I am sure that is how I felt.

Have a great day.  Wishing you success in whatever you choose to do and happiness in doing so. 

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